Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Psychology and the questions my brain wants to ask


So this little blog post and really, little is an understatement, will be separated by two topics. If you're interested in reading, maybe read the first part, take a break, make some dinner, and come back to the second. What I really wanted from this blog is the ability to just post all my frustrations -if I had any-, misgivings, surprises, personal growth moments, off-the-charts happiness levels, whatever. However, given my personality, I couldn't update this as much as I wanted to. To be fair to myself, I was never the type of girl to use a journal. I once bought a journal at Hot Topic to be the brooding, rocker chick type...but I wrote just one page, half of it blank. On the top scribbled as messily organized and as small as possible: I can't say too much, Nicole is sitting by me, and who knows what she would do with this knowledge. If anyone went to my high school, was in my biology or AP World History Class, you should know who Nicole is. Anyways, I think for most people writing in a journal is a cathartic moment, where all the stress or strong emotion can be poured from the tip of an ink pen onto a piece of paper, but for me I have other outlet sources. So yes, there you go, an apology for once again taking forever to write a single blog post! This weekend I will try (underline this readers, because blogger doesn't have an underline function!), try to add the blog post about my trip to London that happened last weekend. Okay, off to the two questions/topics I wanted to focus on.

First, let me introduce the clip that gave me the want to make a blog post about it.


Now, the Jungle Book, written by Rudyard Kipling, from what I've been told is the very representation of racism at its finest, and yeah you could draw parallels of prejudice and down right intolerance from the Disney adaptation of the book, but what makes the movie so enthralling and a classic is the level of maturity and sheer genius that is put into the film. The double entendres and hidden meaning behind phrases like "Yes, Go to sleep. Rest In Peace" is so morbid that it's hilarious, and this element of satisfying the average child as well as the average adult surely is lacking in the present Disney films. What happened to the subtlety! However, this blog wasn't meant as a movie review, so forgive me for my digression. No, why you see this clip is so that I can tell you that the following, top-rated comment for the video is: I get turned on by this, too, but I don't know why. I blame Japan and their tentacle porn.


Now, without thinking about Japan and their tentacle porn, what bothers me is that there is a large group of youtube users -and perhaps some that aren't registered with the site- that have thumbs this comment up. Alarming more, is that this seems more and more like a fetish rather than a trolling comment. Video responses to that particular video have involved video manipulations of Kaa (The python in the video above) strangling other disney female characters, and a lot of the reaction is...well, positive...in a sexualized way. Now, as a psychology major, fetishes are interesting in themselves, because by definition, they are objects, whose real or fantasied presence is psychologically necessary for sexual gratification; and has become an object of fixation to the extent that it may interfere with complete sexual expression.

It could be that the individuals who find this as a turn on could just be seduced by the idea that Kaa represents a phallic symbol-due to serpents being historically conceived as representations of the male sexual organ in not just characteristics, but also in their relation to the tenacity of life, and regeneration. This makes sense if you focus on the victim, being strangled by this "snake". It could be considered slightly erotic in that perspective. And had it been a female, I would have thought that the user response was in relation to that representation and their fixation with their own penis. However! The victim in the video is Mowgli, an 11 or something year old boy, which makes me think there's another fetish in the work. It's called vorarephilia, which is the attraction/arousal to the idea of being eaten (swallowed), eating someone else, or simply observing the process. This is a lot more dangerous, in the sense that in order to be eaten or to eat someone else,someone would usually have to be dead. And, I'm not sure if this is a good fact or a fun one, but the number of people with this fetish has risen, yet luckily there are media outlets to release their gratification (i.e videos like this). So basically, yay for the majority of people with this fetish not killing people! I introduced this topic because I found it very interesting that not only could someone be so open to admit that they found this little Disney clip sexually stimulating, but also gain a small following! Is it definitely vorarephilia? Is it just phallic? I have no idea! However, critiquing and seeing responses on youtube (if you see the clip on the website, you might see my replies, ah!) definitely make me want to learn more about the psychological effects of fetishes.
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Okay, now that that's done, let's move onto topic number 2 which has nothing to do with Rudyard Kipling, Snakes, and fetishes. Or does it..... No, it definitely does not!


The topic is the role of friends in influencing behavior. As we learn in developmental psychology, particularly related to adolescence, peer relationships play a monumental role in identity formation and in the process of making decisions. Friends especially have more influence than peers in a teenager's decision to do positive behaviors -but more significantly- negative ones as well. For negative behaviors, this includes the pressure to try drugs, have sex, steal, etcetera, and the influence of friends is significantly higher than that of peers in general. That's probably why you've heard parents say, "Don't hang out with so and so, he's a bad influence!" Anyways, to prevent me from going off on a tangent, I'll just get to the point! No one has ever talked about the influential power of friends on the topic of dating and on crushes! I'm not afraid to say -mostly because this is my blog- that I asked that question on google and google scholar (psht, the library is for the 20th century). And what I got in return was just some website dedicated to black people loving this one white couple, which....hopefully was a joke between friends and not a real website... Sidenote: this website dedicated itself to saying that the majority of Black people hated White people, and yet this one couple, called Jill and Mike or something along those lines were accepted based off of some sort of cool, hip factor. Website can be found here: http://www.blackpeopleloveus.com/ K . sidenote ended!

But yes, I'll admit that I'm not afraid, I ask google questions that I can't ask my group of friends for several reasons, mainly one being that they won't know the answers to said questions. I've reflected on this particular topic of friends being the source of developing feelings for someone else or even dating that person for years . Why? Mainly because that I'm the type of person that will convince myself that I like someone simply because my friends say so. Recently, I was told by a friend that I had feelings for someone who I've never had feelings for, and that turned the world that I was clinging to this week upside down. I started to think that maybe I did, and the feeling of dread came over me, forcing me to believe that what I had with this person could be totally destroyed if I give into these "feelings". I seeked for a few days for answers, and all I could think of, was ....maybe my friends are right, they know me, perhaps they know me more than myself? What if my subconscious knows and I'm too blind to see what is so obvious, obvious enough for my friends to see the hidden meaning? Luckily, I sat by a fellow psychology major, who is also a good friend, on my way to a class in the middle of effin' nowhere, and we discussed this topic. In her opinion, she said that the reliance (not to be confused with dependency) on someone can be confused for infatuation/crushing. Simply, that when you go to that one person for help, you're doing it, not because you like him/her, but that you know they'll give you the attention you need/deserve/want and that there is a certain reciprocity between you two. So, in the end, your trust in the person is just that, no hidden feelings. And when you laugh at someone's joke, it's not some high school musical, dawson's creek mimicry of flirtation, you just think that person is funny and accept their type of humor in a world that needs to laugh more. I'm not sure if that's the truth, but it sounds like a good answer and it relieved me of stress that I dont need anymore of. If you have hypothesis/ideas about this topic, let me know! I'd love to read them..

For next week, or at the end of the week, I'll tell you about the amazing bartender in London. He was so hilarious and cool, I wish he could be my friend haha!

Thanks for reading! I hope someone gives you cookies and ice cream :)


Here's just two videos that have nothing to do with this post. They're just dancing videos that gave me motivation to do what I love most: dance. Plus, they might let your brain relax after reading this huge post.

In the first video, the quality is very poor, due to the shooting being far away, however, the lead (male) ....yeah I met him, he taught us tango technique and he's quite possibly one of the most gorgeous men on the planet. Fun fact: me and a good dancing friend were speaking with accents for about an hour and a half, playing pool, the man in the video came up to us, with his squared shoulders, long, wavy dark hair, grey eyes, and a dazzling smile, saying, "Hello, ladies". We forgot all train of thought, forgot our game of creating accents, forgot the pool game-who was stripes? who was solids- giggled and swooned. I'm not the type of girl to just get all ditzy over some super model, yet I was nearly left a puddle of jelly after that interaction. No one needs to look and dance like that, he's a hazard to society. Back to the video: the falling and lifting of the follower-female- reminds me of life, with all of its pick-me-ups and let-me-downs.



Second video: is a video of Argentine Tango like the first, but this relies on speed, and although the dance is rigid, in the sense that the male lead has so much power over his follower, the focus is on her, and her manipulation makes her -and therefore, him- seductive. Look how fast they move!

Enjoy today and think about tomorrow another time!


A big thanks to Sinead for saying that she wanted to read this new update, especially since I wasn't sure anyone reads it. That, and thank you Maria Mena's Our Battles. This song really allowed me to type what I needed and wanted to say!





Saturday, October 15, 2011

First off!




First, I must apologize for not updating this blog! It's been so stressful trying to find a place to stay, worry about rent, worry about cultural barriers, the language, finding classes, finding the school, and trying to jumble that with a social life. So after finishing that small apologetic note, let me tell you that I'll post once -if not twice- a week. Toussaint, the french holiday celebrating and honoring the lives of dead relatives and the Catholic saints, is starting next week -officially for us students Oct. 21st- and I plan on going out with a bang, in the country of fashion, delicious food, art and museums, rich history, and a large population of Italians...that's right the country is Italy! I'll be going on a solo adventure -my first ever in Europe- to Milan and Rome, meeting with old friends from my home university (Santa Cruz) and new ones-maybe a random italian street vendor? I'll post pictures as well as videos for those interested in seeing my excursion. My only fear in going is that I dont speak Italian, the most I can say is "Inglese?" and you can only get so far with hand gestures -though the Italians love those. No, my hope is to meet Snooky and the gang of pseudo Italian-Americans from Jersey Shore, gain notoriety, fame, and hopefully free chocolates by appearing in a new episode where the cast thinks they're in Florence, but really it's Milan.

Back to france, because that's where I am currently.

At times, it's extremely difficult to find a niche here. I dont mean to generalize this -for those going to france one day, this doesn't mean you'll have the same experience, I'm just talking about myself...which is why I have a blog!! For those who know me, Sacramentoans, Santa Cruzeans, anyone I've met in real life -or as I like to say "non-facebook life", I'm rather hyper, outgoing, vivacious -some would say curvaceous...haha jk!- open-minded, etc, yet once the language changes from english to french, my personality also changes. I become timid, shy, easily scared, intimidated, etc. I suppose that just comes from not pushing yourself to the full potential? For me, it's easier to speak with strangers in french rather than friends, which might be because with friends you might say something stupid, and that might haunt you forever...or worst, your friends might find it cute, not tease you, and continue to let your language learning skills grow! However, with speaking with strangers, you could say something like "where are the carrots at 4 pm, under the bridge Mr. Ophelia Winters" and just walk away -or if you want to have fun with them- spring/skip into the distance...and whatever, you dont have to see them again and if you do, they'll eventually get off the metro that you're also taking. It's not just that though, it's also the culture, the french tend to be more reserved in comparison to Americans -this is a generalization, I'm sure everyone knows that kid in social studies just sat in the corner of the room, playing with the buttons on his jacket during recess- but that characteristic makes it a bit hard to meet french people -not that they're not around, this is France, but rather it can be a bit daunting to approach them if they seem robotic. However, for those interested in studying, living, or just visiting France, reserved does not mean cold. It might come off as "get the hell away from me" but really, I like to think they're just shy and if you can somehow overcome the language barrier, make them laugh, then they're pretty much like a sidekick and will defend you with their life...well, maybe...

With a con, comes a pro!
The french people in my city, which is Lyon, are incredibly nice. There's been numerous times where I've asked directions in pigeon french -no I didn't say something like "where is le restaurant?!" and people have went out of their route to walk me there, or if I have a suitcase in hand, they'll often carry it for me. Also, for some reason the french love to talk about america...well, a little bit less than their love of talking about politics and about americans loving Mcdonalds, but their vision and dream of america is interesting, particularly California. If you're not from L.A or San Francisco though, they wont know why your city is important...which is okay, because if someone asked me about Talouse, I'd be like 'I have nothing talouse...' haha =/ horrible joke sorry.

One last thing before I leave...
I have two assignments that I find interesting..which maybe you will too? The first is making a psychological profile....okay, really it's all about making observations, but how cool does it sound if I say psychological profile?! I've decided to use the time in Italy and really by use time, I mean like 10 minutes stalking restaurant terraces, and record observations. Not sure how to get passed the fact that I don't speak Italian, but maybe it could be like a cool silent film where I focus on body language?






second project: For my Anglais des medias class, I've decided to write about the profiling -love that word!- of mafiosos, mainly women in the mafia. Not sure how that'll seem to a class filled with french people learning english.... but she said to choose something you're passionate about..and if I can't choose history of crime, then what else is there in life!

okay, that's it! Thank you so much for reading. In case you were wondering, tomorrow I plan on exploring the city, eating some bomb cheerios which are slightly different than the ones in the US, going to a bar to meet some Frenchies :), and then going to a house warming party!!!

Check back next week for pictures of Annecy, a city in france I went to last weekend, and a secret surprise!!!


If you're interesting in knowing the history and tradition of toussaint, check out the link below!


-kendra <3


They visit special church services and place flowers on family graves. Ine

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Hi I'm Kendra!

I'm a psychology major at UCSC. My favorite branches of psychology are Social and Personality psychology (but i'm also really fond of cognitive sciences, as well). I'm 21. I love to dance. I've been dancing for about 6 years now trying different styles including: ballet, jazz, hip hop, blues, tango etc. I hope while abroad I can continue dancing and meeting fellow dancers. Apparently, Lyon is renown for their dance environment and has an annual dance show/performance where the world's top dancers come to show off their talent-I'll hopefully be posting videos of/about dancing while abroad, if I can. I've always had a passion for French culture and the language and for some strange reason, I found it easier to learn than Spanish. Though I'm scared to go abroad, to a new country that will be extremely foreign to me, I'm really excited to take on this challenge and see what treasures I can find. Yeah. I have skype, so I'll probably post my skype info for anyone that wants to chat while I'm over there!